Wednesday, March 2, 2011

I scan the horizon for you, Mimi

We had a quick overnighter at the beach on the weekend.  It wasn't the greatest place; overpriced and only okay.  We needed to get away though, first-day-of-school anxiety was making an insomniac of my sixth grader.  The beach was the best remedy I could think of.
She reread all her Judy Blume books in the weeks before school started.  We chatted about  puberty and popularity.  Me, paddling madly beneath the surface, keeping my head up, maintaining a calm, effortless, buoyant, composure.  She's wading in and it scares me a little.
When I run, I often repeat the mantra, "step lightly" and sometimes just the word "light."  I think of it often when I'm talking with her; how important it is to not slam down on her with the full force of my own anxiety and fear.  light.  light.  light... 

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